Boobs And Vaginas Leaving Streaming This Month

February 22, 2018 | NSFW | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Now is the sad time that we say goodbye to the tits and vages leaving your favorite streaming services, and even though they’re art doofus, you can see all the bit parts right here. For the sake of art. Doofus. Ola Ray’s nipple planets in 10 to Midnight, Edwige Fenech’s rack in Strip Nude for […]

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Jennifer Aniston Photographed Suicidal Over Lack Of Penis

February 22, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Well, it’s started. Jennifer Aniston might be an internationally famous multi-millionaire, but first and foremost she is a women, and according to TMZ she just can’t handle the fact that she doesn’t have a penis in her vagina. The miserable barren old bag of crap was photographed leaving Grauman’s Chinese Theater where she attended the premiere of […]

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Donald Trump Note Card Responses To Parkland Families

February 22, 2018 | News | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Yesterday Donald Trump held a photo op bitch and stitch with survivors of the Parkland, Florida school shooting, and in order to convey his deeply felt, raw, unfettered compassion for their experiences, he brought along a note card with scripted conversational prompts and responses. This I Am Sam realness is drawing the ire of the […]

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Frankel My Dear I Don’t Give A Damn

February 22, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Bethenny Frankel is ninety-five-years-old and has had a kid, and still manages to have, technically, a pretty amazing beach bod that she often gets credit for in the headlines. Never mind the fact that her face looks like it belongs on the shrunken head of Maria Shriver. Bethenny’s body looks good, and she doesn’t even […]

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Jared Leto – Justin Timberlake Stole My Bustier

February 21, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Any man who has ever gotten a blow out should never be trusted, and any man who suddenly makes Jared Leto’s fashion choices look age-appropriate and not-douchebag-y should probably think about ending his own life. It’s time Justin. It’s time. Justin Timberlake is a known asshole in the industry and during his recent Super Bowl […]

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Karla Souza’s Mexico Rape Experience

February 21, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

The only thing worse than being in Mexico is being raped in Mexico, and in an interview with CNN, How to Get Away With Murder actress Karla Souza alleged that she endured just that while shooting a movie at the beginning of her acting career. The native Mexican had the true Cancun Spring Break experience shared […]

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Natalie Portman’s Creative “Woke” Woody Allen Spin

February 21, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Since pretty much every actor and actress in Hollywood has kissed the ring slipped onto the crepey blotched hand of Woody Allen over the six decades that he has been directing five good movies and three-hundred terrible ones, pretty much every actor or actress in Hollywood must face questioning regarding his sexual misconduct because this […]

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Jennifer Lawrence Wants To Have Sex With Timotheé Chalamet

February 21, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

My co-workers and I just had a rousing conversation hypothesizing what could be going on in Jennifer Lawrence’s head right now, because she’s obviously on the cusp of a mental breakdown, and we settled on either tail-end-of-America’s-sweetheart-status syndrome or Adderall. Or of course both. The twenty-seven-year-old is hitching herself to the Timotheé Chalamet bandwagon by describing […]

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Stewie Will Probably Come Out As Gay In New Family Guy Episode

February 20, 2018 | News | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

As a huge Family Guy fan I have seen every episode about as many times as you would expect a loser to watch them, and even though the past two seasons were obviously written by an Ambien-fueled hamster, I still tune in, because, loser. Producer Rich Appel has revealed to TV Line that an upcoming […]

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Guess That Plastic Surgery Victim

February 20, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

If you’re a celebrity and you don’t look like an hourglass with too much sand in the bottom, should you just kill yourself? This is definitely the look of the moment, and when things change in about two years, look for overflowing landfills thanks to all the discarded ass implants. You might have already seen […]

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