Katy Perry Back Banging Bloom

With Katy claiming to kiss girls and like it, no one knows why her heterosexual relationships keep failing. read more

Bonnie Tyler Books an Eclipse Gig

There have only ever been two reasons to embark on a cruise ship. Gambling in international waters and endless drink tickets. Three if you happen to love gay sex and dwell in a red state.  read more

Leo DiCaprio's New Model

Life for Leonardo DiCaprio is amazing. When you're not lying about saving glaciers, you're busy banging barely legal models. read more

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Heidi Montag Glowing

Heidi Montag is milking her larvae for all it's worth by posing for anyone who gets wet thinking about a pregnant mangled Barbie. The reality television sensation opens up to blog The Fullest about being an international joke. Montag also beaches herself on Beyoncé's... read more

ESPN's Slave Auction Goes Over Well (VIDEO)

Every purely moral crusade must eventually begin consuming its own tale. ESPN is now under fire for a fantasy football player auction skit that too closely resembled a slave auction of the antebellum South. read more

Kim Kardashian Racist Defense Apology

Racists are all the rage right now, and Kim Kardashian seemed to have caught the bug for a millisecond before denouncing her wavering convictions. Apparently there's someone alive on this planet named Jeffree Star, and apparently, he's a makeup artist who talked shit... read more

Christina El Moussa Wants Her Money

It's not easy being a divorced bleach blonde 34-year old in Orange County. Not like the ten thousand others of your ilk remarrying business men looking for trophy wives and a blow job on the major holidays and every third Tuesday.  read more

Drink Wine With Jennifer Lawrence and Her Breasts and Save The Nation (VIDEO)

Hollywood celebrities have come to discover large amounts of corruption in national politics, on or about November 9th of last year. Prior to that, Goldman Sachs and Chevron were doing the right thing with their PAC and speech money. Also, Russia had a sweet national... read more

Alabama Also Says DTF Teachers Good to Go With Their Teen Students

An Alabama judge declared it unconstitutional to punish teachers for banging their sixteen and over students since that is the age of majority in the Southern state. read more

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Gigi Hadid Underwhelms

I thought people turned to Vogue for aspirational fashion. Not to dress like a woman Cara Delevingne would Snapchat herself tongue fucking in an Urban Outfitters changing room.   read more

Tiger Woods Toxicology Report Is a National Emergency

Toxicology reports were force-released by an ESPN public records request, revealing Woods blood contained zero alcohol. Though a nice cocktail of Vicodin, Dilaudid (Morphine derivative), Xanax, Ambien, and weed. read more

Are Reality Show Attention Whores Worse Than Neo-Nazis?

The classic ethical dilemma where you have to steer the train left and take out disturbing silicone injected social media attention whores or guide the train right and decapitate some JuCo guy named Dylan who loves Hitler t-shirts. The seven-ten split is never an option.... read more