Beast Kardashian Attacks Flash Mob (VIDEO)

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

That was a close call. New footage that some lucky person sold to Backgrid for too much money shows Beast Kardashian in her natural habitat, where she goes in for the kill to feast on a flash mob incited by Kourtney Kardashian. No fast movements people! Nobody dies in the video, but from sheer Kardashian […]

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Guess The Newest Pornstar That Just Bought Oneway Ticket To Heaven

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

In a world where we can never have true equality as long as ebony porn is its own category another young pornstar, Olivia Nova, bites the dust. The world of porn is starting to get deeper than the free three minute videos you jerk off to before work. It’s like the lady from the scene […]

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Lindsay Lohan Misses America

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Lindsay Lohan was short on cash so she leased her body as an alabaster outhouse to the highest foreign bidder. Since her last cinematic flop she managed to flirt with the idea of Islam and an uber wealthy Korean bodybuilder. She would be a bonafide cosmopolitan if leaving was actually by choice. But it wasn’t […]

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Taraji P. Henson Wrestling Ageism Against Actresses

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Now that women are winning the war against sexual harassment in Hollywood phase two of the master plan involves including the elderly in more roles. Age discrimination and the spectrum of what’s aesthetically acceptable needs to get a little wider according to Taraji P.  Henson. Expect to see more wrinkles and more sag this summer. […]

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Rob Lowe And His Vag SLAM Bella Thorne For Mudslide Tweet

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

I’ve suspected for quite a while that Rob Lowe is the owner of a hot pink pussy, and he all but confirmed this horrifying image yesterday by getting into a Twitter brawl with a twenty-year-old girl. Yes, the girl is botched starlet Bella Thorne, who already has the life experience and overall aesthetic of a […]

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Floyd Mayweather Flunked His #MeToo Test (VIDEO)

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Athletes are often asked to comment on outside-of-sports matters to which they have no educational background or intellectual curiosity. It never goes well. It shouldn’t. Dumb models practice fake answers to grown up questions in pageants and they still come off as potato heads. A reporter from Men’s Health, who appeared to be maybe twelve […]

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The Mr. Skin Minute Exposes the Golden Globes of This Year’s Winners (VIDEO)

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Robert Paulsen| 0 Comments

  This week’s Mr. Skin Minute is a tribute to the winners! This year, three actresses were awarded Golden Globes for roles in which they went nude, which is a win-win for Mr. Skin! Nicole Kidman took home Best Actress in a Limited Series for her work in the HBO miniseries Big Little Lies, where she went nude a grand total of five […]

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Mom of “Monkey” Hoodie Model Seems Nonplussed

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Sometimes it’s easy to forget that Diddy and TheWeeknd and LeBron James have a sharper understanding of what’s good for you and your children than you do. Common mistake. As with Dr. Spock in generations before. Also, whoever invented the idea of “time outs”. A series of black entertainers and athletes called out retailer H&M […]

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Seal Targets Oprah Because Politics Just Got Good

January 12, 2018 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

You have to have a monster ego to want to be President because the process of obtaining the job is perhaps the most dehumanizing endless rounds of trolling ever. And it pays less than McDonald’s fry jobs in Seattle now. The buzz around Oprah for President created after the Golden Globes by a lazy and […]

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Kendall Jenner To Solve World’s Problems With Cupid

January 11, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Well this is a relief for Jessica Chastain, who doesn’t seem to have gotten her global “transformation social change” off the ground quite yet. Fake model and Petree dish face Kendall Jenner has another solution for worldwide peace love and understanding that’s most likely about as realistic as what Chastin is cooking up, and it […]

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