Jessica Hart Making Thirty Work

January 12, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Running backs and models rarely make it to thirty still working. Jessica Hart feels fortunate to be booking paid swimsuit and lingerie gigs at thirty. That’s seventeen years into her career, having been discovered at thirteen for her first magazine gig.


Kendall Jenner, Bella Hadid And Alessandra Ambrosio Getting Paid

September 17, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Fashion Week separates the wheat from the chaff. It’s all fun and games to pretend you’re hot at 5’1″ with an obscenely plumped up bottoms and titties, but when these fashion houses are plunking down millions to sell simply stunning variations of the same shit they’ve all been selling for years, that’s when the body […]


Jessica Hart Ass Cheeks Back to Work

March 19, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It’s been a long year for Jessica Hart being on on Taylor Swift’s shit list. Swift had Hart offed from the Victoria’s Secret fashion show for failing to recognize Swift’s superior genetics to every other human being on the planet. It’s a simple ask. Taylor, you’re the best. Your vagina smells like mint and kittens. […]


Jessica Hart In Painted On Bikini

December 10, 2014 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Jessica Hart posed for Porter Magazine in a painted on gold bikini. I feel weird when I wear boxer briefs at the Hard Rock pool because I forgot to bring swim trunks. Actually that might be justified. Even getting a massage and begging for a hand job afterwards seems oddly personal, and I’m covered in […]


Taylor Swift Pulls Power Move

December 3, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Taylor Swift has reportedly blacklisted Victoria’s Secret model Jessica Hart from their annual Parade of hot chicks prancing around in stupid shit. This comes after Hart made some disparaging comments about her, according to an anonymous Insider who could easily be a bored coked up janitor who works for the venue: “No one can know that […]


Taylor Swift Couldn’t Kill Jessica Hart

December 7, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Taylor Swift’s prom-less minions may have figured out how to scare Victoria’s Secret into firing Jessica Hart for her disloyal comment about Taylor’s fat hips or whatever, but they couldn’t stop making her better looking than their pufferfish-faced liege. Somebody else already hired Jessica Hart to flash her ass and gap-toothed grin for the cameras. […]


Victoria’s Secret Fires Jessica Hart Over Taylor Swift Diss

December 4, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’ve warned people before about the retaliation factor of Taylor Swift crazy teen fan online Fascists. Her virtual army of early anxiety medicated B-students take to the digital airwaves like Taylor’s own Praetorian Guard, beating down even the slightest naysayer. The latest victim is gap-toothed model Jessica Hart who had the vagina balls to say […]