Kelly Bensimon in A Bikini

January 30, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s no SIC code in particular for lifestyle advisor, faux celebrity book author, and costume jewelry seller, but it certainly seems to be the lucrative business of many women previously married to relatively well known men.

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Kelly Bensimon And Barely Legal Daughter Sea Bensimon in Bikinis

December 27, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s no more stark visual refence of time than seeing an eighteen year old girl in her bikini and her forty-eight year old mom going even tinier on the two piece.

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Heidi Klum Cloned

November 1, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Heidi Klum’s Halloween costume of five other Heidi Klum rode the fine line of narcissim, then jumped it. Each year Heidi Klum hosts a corporate sponsored Halloween party because she wisely doesn’t do shit for free outside of fucking young men.

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Kelly Bensimon in A Bikini

December 30, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Why am I so happy? Because I’m 50 and college guys think I’m 30. Affording the A-list surgeons is huge. Go Jewish or go home. You can support the H1-B visa program in other ways. Don’t get the guy who supplements with Uber driving at night. You’re trusting this man with your new tits. He should […]

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Kelly Bensimon Almost Ready

January 29, 2015 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

You don’t hear much about cold fusion these days because most of science is now involved in piecing these Housewives together and sending them out into public to see if they can pass. Water is the new environment to be tested. A few of the Atlanta wives completely dissolved in failed trial runs. If this […]

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Kelly Bensimon Tits and Bikini Made In Different Factories

January 20, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

When these Bravo Housewives get out in the sun, you see the power of elective surgery and anorexia working hand in hand to turn back the clock. The Indian casinos keep hiring these stitched up hens to promote their hotels so there must be something there beyond my powers of perception. Maybe protruding rib bones […]

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Kelly Bensimon And Ramona Singer in Bikinis

December 31, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

When two Bravo Housewives bump into each other it’s customary for them to get loaded on wine until they lose control of their bladders then laugh hysterically. It’s kind of like a secret handshake, but with a strong urine stench that requires soaking bikinis in bleach overnight. These two vivisected and reconstructed middle aged beauties […]

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