Paris Hilton Wants Children

February 16, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Paris Hilton wants to lay on her back this time for a more purposeful reason than just practicing procreation with an abundance of partners like she always has before in the past. Instead of shooting instructional videos in night vision on where a guy should shoot his load if a woman wishes to avoid kids, […]


Paris Hilton Is Paris Hilton In New Video Directed By Fiancé

February 15, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Before the Kardashians and the Jenners and the Hadids there was the one OG celeb prostitute Paris Hilton, and while it’s been nine decades since anyone on the Internet took the time to call her a whore in earnest, over the past few years Hilton has amazingly been able to flip the script and revive […]


Paris Hilton Dressing Just Like Kim Kardashian

January 31, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

If you ever looked at Kim Kardashian and thought “mmm, that’s so hot, I want it so bad” A) you’re into centaur bestiality and need professional help and B) you’re also in luck, because Paris Hilton is bringing double the bewigged mare double the fun realness by dressing just like Kim for a bunch of Instagram […]


Paris Hilton Engaged, People Magazine There To Capture The Magic

January 2, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Zylka’s Yelp review for this Hilton: “Looked nice enough but when I got under the sheets there were bugs everywhere.”


Women Are Innovators Too

November 24, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Paris Hilton and Britney Spears will go down in history for starting the selfie revolution. What have you personally contributed to society? I bet it’s no where near as great as taking your own self portrait.


Kate Hudson Classic Beauty and Shit Around the Web

October 25, 2017 | crap around the web | Robert Paulsen| 0 Comments

Paris Hilton’s Halloween duds, Mr. Skin’s nudity filled DVD releases, and more!


Burning Man Gets Helipads

August 30, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

If you were waiting to attend Burning Man, the annual late summer gathering of half-naked acid tripping junior marketing executives in the Nevada desert, until they had a landing strip for private planes and helicopters, wait no longer.


Paris Hilton Revives Reality TV

August 17, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Paris Hilton is underrated. Her powers of resurrection rival that of Jesus Christ himself. And now she’s bringing reality TV back from the dead. 


Paris Hilton Pushing Panties

June 30, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Paris Hilton is many things, among them, hyper aware that women in numerous Eastern nations and multiple emirates want to be her. Men there want to fuck her too, but they know the price for that is more than a $60 bottle of her signature fragrance or a healthy cover charge at one of her name-licensed nightclubs in Dubai.



Conrad Hilton Courtroom Crazy (VIDEO)

May 11, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Imagine a steep slide with zero friction and no handrails. At the bottom is full Nick Nolte crazy. Conrad Hilton is flying down the slide halfway to Nolte.