Zuckerberg VR Safari Rapes Puerto Rico (VIDEO)

October 12, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Mark Zuckerberg could blame a shit ton of his social errors on Asperger’s. And he probably should. 


Zuckerberg Paternity Leave Request Accepted

August 29, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s nothing worse than rich cuckolds pretending they’re one of the guys. You wouldn’t let Judd Apatow or Chris Martin into your weekly Hold ‘Em game.


Zuckerberg Visiting Blue Collar Families

May 1, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There are only two types of billionaires received favorably by the masses. The eccentric sports team owners who bring home trophies and Warren Buffett. Bill Gates has saved millions of lives in Africa, but hasn’t put out a decent Windows since ’98 so what have you done for me lately?


Zuckerberg Going Full Haole

January 19, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It’s easier for super rich people to be aggressive assholes 24×7. Secretly, everybody assumes you are. It’s almost impossible to win with a gee-golly everyman front. Everyone will use it against you when you start suing tribal property owners in tropical lands to build your mega beach fortress.


Avril Lavigne Pegs Zuckerberg

December 26, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

When you’re worth fifty billion, consider hiring a professional give your material a once over before taking the stage. Zuckerberg did a selfie-promo for Jarvis, the new A.I. technology from Facebook that will speak extremely eloquently while secretly selling your online behavior to marketing agencies.


Zuckerberg Tolerates Thiel

October 20, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

If you remember watching The Social Network, Zuckerberg was the Harvard nerd who stole his friend’s algorithm and the app idea of some WASPy twins on campus and promptly invented TheFacebook. Peter Thiel was the Aspy not yet Gawker outed gay but already successful right wing venture capitalist who funded the big expansion into what is now known as Facebook.


Norwegians Back Down Zuckerberg

September 12, 2016 | WTF | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Mark Zuckerberg came under fire from a Norwegian newspaper for deleting a Facebook posted article of the Seven Photographs That Changed the History of Warfare. The article contained that iconic photo of the nine-year old naked local girl running away from a Napalm strike during the Vietnam war. To the Facebook censorship algorithm, it was child pornography.


Zuckerberg Building a Wall

June 28, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

If there’s one thing Mark Zuckerberg can’t abide, it’s inquisitive neighbors catching him masturbating to the porn stripped off his social media apps so there’s more server space for Islamic jihadi communiques.


Mark Zuckerberg Rips Off His Kid And Shit Around The Web

December 3, 2015 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

Billionaire nerd Mark Zuckerberg who once had a friend invent something for him once is planning on giving away 99% of his money in honor of his new baby being born. Thanks, Dad. And, fuck you. Seriously? 1%? (Last Men On Earth) Do you think topless beauty Lacey Banghard bangs hard? (Egotastic All-Stars) I can’t […]


Trump Takes on Facebook

August 18, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Donald Trump takes on the big names. Occasionally, illegal immigrant ice cream cart vendors and masa kneading abuelitas, but at times, direct for the gullet of the rich and powerful in his own class. Trump’s latest Tourette’s like outburst was targeted at Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg who is widely admired despite being the world’s largest Bond villain gatherer of private […]